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Screw Those Kids, Eat All the Candy Yourself

This month—the month of Halloween—has been chock full of hand wringing and fretting, some of it centered around trick-or-treating and the children. People are (rightly) concerned about handing candy to kids in the safest way possible, but they’re also worried about the lasting trauma that a lack of trick-or-treating might inflict. (I think they’ll get over it.) And, though this very site has come

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